Leaked documents revealing the extent of US-led corporate interference in European football under the proposed TTIP trade agreement have raised fears for the future of domestic leagues throughout Europe.
Under the controversial agreement European clubs will be obliged to maximise their interest to the American viewing public unfamiliar with the game, or risk being sued for loss of potential earnings.
The stipulations include:
- All London teams merging into one, Big Ben Cockney Kickers
- Anfield being renamed either Strawberry Fields or Penny Lane
- Lazio and Roma merging to form Rome Centurions, and wearing metal breastplates
- Bayern Munich playing in lederhosen and spiked helmets
- The Milan clubs moving to the USA, since most Americans have never heard of Milan
- Offside, handball and all infringement rules abolished, to avoid confusion over disallowed goals
- All black players joining one team, Africa Soccer Safari, since Americans are unaware of black Europeans, and also believe that Africa is one country, possibly in Europe
A petition signed by prominent campaigners and celebrities, including ex-footballers Gary Neville and Pat Nevin, was yesterday handed to UK Sports Minister Tracey Crouch outside the House of Commons. The petition calls for assurance from the government that the terms of the agreement will be rejected.
In contrast, UEFA president Michel Platini said the TTIP proposals opened up "exciting new avenues to explore".
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